re: poem/song!!!

Hello friends, fans, foe and lovers,

revisiting some old projects and stumbled across these songs, and poems, check them out!!!


https://soundcloud.com/chris-bose/words-are-the-devil

enjoy,

CB

re: new poem !!!!

Dealing with a new life:

Being sober is a much

Needed change

In many ways it

Is like a getting a new car

I traded in my rez rocket

For new dreams

New goals

My life is like a new car

A new war pony

For the journey ahead

I am still walking

Around

Kicking the tires

Wondering what to get

Out of this life

Shaking this hopeless

Feeling off

Hasn't been easy

The loss of my kids

The loss of my relationship

Because

I didn't know how to be in one

All residential school

Hangovers

That I had to stop

From infecting

My kids

Rusted over

Creativity has broken

Loose

And is free now

I reclaim my languages

Secwepemc and Nlaka pamux

I pore over books

Of history

Learning about how our

World changed in 1810

When the first fur trading post

-->

Went up in Secwepemc territory

the greedy bastards

have never stopped wanting.

re: more new poems

The party is over:

It hurts where I used to play

I’ve become invisible

To women of a variety

Of ages

As I let myself go

Here and there

Spilling out of my shirt

And sides

My orgasm sounds have become

My pissing sounds

Whereas a few years ago

I was enjoying the field

Now I enjoy watching

Marathon episodes

Of new comedies or

Action thriller series

I no longer think

About relationships

Or maybe “this one will work”

Or anything like that

I watch friends

Try and try again relationships

Meh

I don’t want to share my time

With anyone anymore

Time is precious

I don’t want to learn to deal

with idiosyncrasies

Or live with anyone

Or listen to their bullshit

Or neurosis

No I’m content to putter

About my home

Make art

Play guitar

And parent my children

As I prepare

To enter the third quarter of my life

I’m cool with it.

The road:

I’m tired of it

Tired of being on it

It no longer is fun

Anymore

I loathe hotels

Airports

And bus terminals

The smell of an airplane

As you get on

Dry and fake

The fart smell of a bus

The air conditioning

Wheezing away

I’ve noticed

That people no longer

Talk to one another on buses

I think because everyone

Is exhausted and overwhelmed

And overloaded

By life

That and they’re endlessly

On smart phones, tablets

And other technology

Whereas people on planes

Still chat each other up

Probably because of some

Base fear of dying alone

In a plane crash

I do like being in fancy hotels

And looking like I don’t belong

Sitting there in my paint covered

Clothes

Tired, grubby looking

And worn out

Sometimes I’ll get asked if I’m staying

There to which I’ll reply

“No, but can I just stay in the lobby

like five more hours?”

and security is called

and then I produce my key card

and identification which is verified

at the front desk

and the person or person who complained

look all confused and angry

All while I smile and laugh

savouring that feeling

like I’ve created a new way

to hurt someone’s feelings

nom nom nom nom

it feeds me

being able to be in a confrontation

where I know I’m totally right

and there’s nothing they can do

about it.

re: newer poem~!

Over a month ago:

I decided to quit

Drinking

It was about the third

Time this year

But this time it took

And I enjoy

Waking up

In the morning

Without a crushing hangover

A dry pasty mouth

Reeling from a blackout

Worried about what I said

The night before

Online while drunk

Reacting emotionally

And wondering why no one

Had invented a breathalyzer

For computers

Before posting stupid things

On the inter-webs

Nope

It has been over a month

And I noticed

Something different

This time around

The improvement

Of my overall

Well being mentally

And physically

Just feeling so much

Better instead

Of so much bitter

Has been an incredible

Boost for my mind

And spirit

I realized

I was hitting

The bottle out of sadness

Loneliness

Anger and self-pity

And had been for a long time

Most of my life

Has been about

Dealing with loss

Loss of home

Of family life

Of language

Of culture

Of various anchor

Points in my life

Like my grandfather

My grandmother

Both were

Storytellers

Both knew our land

And language so well

They were intertwined

My parents

Had both been through

Residential schools

And were in many ways

Broken

So trying to raise a child

In that broken

Was never easy or

Even possible

Perhaps?

Anyway

I quit drinking

And feel all the better

For it

I knew its time had come.